I pray to God for some sanity. Its not that the confusion with my situation has driven me over the edge and quite literally insane, its everything that makes up that confusion. If it would all just go away that would be ideal. Suicide is not an answer because getting rid of all of those problems would in essence be doing away with myself. These problems are seemingly unavoidable, yet somehow they seem to often bring upon events that nobody would ever want to deal with, especially by choice.
Now if I did in fact have a choice there would be no need to experience what is happening. Some of the the things which have happened to me occured at such a young age that I am indeed no way responsible. The consequences are a series of different, but ultimately related things that I have to deal with. Now if at some point they cease to exist and I live free, I will truly be grateful.
Until next time...
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